Writing Assignment

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  • by Frank Paynter on August 27, 2024

    Here’s a challenge — re-write the following craptastical post by Halley Suitt to eliminate most of whatever makes it suck:

    There is something so classic about heavy metal Gothic videos. They all look alike. Big dining room table in big dark mansion, cobwebs on candlesticks, pierced girls with much mascara. Top 20 Countdown, some things you can just always depend on.

    { 7 comments… read them below or add one }

    Troy Worman 08.27.06 at 8:21

    Are we supposed to do that here or at our own place and link back here?

    Frank Paynter 08.27.06 at 10:01

    Whatever pleases YOU, Troy!

    ARJ 08.28.06 at 12:57

    OK, here’s my go:
    When I was a little girl I decided I wanted to be a harpist after watching with fascination the harp being played in the Ventura Symphony Orchestra. But I danced ballet instead, and now I can vicariously get my harp on. I am still kicking myself for not seeing her show when she was out here in Sydney. Mr Wiggins calls it “insane gelfling music.”

    madame l. 08.28.06 at 1:00

    i cannot believe the Dov Charney asslicking here.
    is a fucking bitch.

    ARJ 08.28.06 at 1:16

    (er, that is, in regards to Joanna Newsom, the insane gelfling singing in that wee video up there.)

    Johnno 08.28.06 at 5:17

    There is little difference between a heavy metal Gothic video and a Star Trek convention, same skinny guys with longer hair, the women wear less clothes and everyone wears black.

    Charles Follymacher 08.28.06 at 6:19

    Nothing shouts conformity! like paint-by-the-numbers rebellion. Like the way catholic school girls uniformly adjust afterschool hemlines, or the direction of goth videos founded on de rigeur giant black dining room tables set in dank mansions. Still seeking the irregular beats.

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