Embarrassed by media attention, election officials have locked down the second precinct in Snobbler’s Crotch, Alabama. The Liebold voting machine was moved from the precinct polling place at the Robert Johnson Bait and Tackle shop to the first precinct at the George Wallace Court House where a recount could be conducted without undue pressure. Updated results follow:
Results1 (second precinct re-count):
It was originally reported that of the 6 votes cast in Precinct Two at the Robert Johnson Bait and Tackle shop, results were divided.
Republican:
Huckabee — 137
Democrat:
Clinton — 2
Obama — 4
Updated results following re-count:
Republican:
Huckabee — 137
McCain — 186
Democrat:
Clinton — 2
Obama — 2
__________________
1 — not inclusive of write-ins which are generally problematic given the literacy rate in Snobbler’s Crotch.
John McCain, campaigning today at Pelican Bay State Prison near Crescent City, California expressed no surprise. “I won’t let those folks Swift boat me. They all need a good swift kick in the butt,” the candidate said pugnaciously. “Tom Swift, Jonathan Swift, I don’t think any of those guys are that swift. I’ve got a few ironies in the fire. These election results are going to benefit ALL the people,” McCain concluded inclusively.
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