October 2007

Like so many others, I too have been visited by Anger and his three legged dog Grief. I was in a real stew yesterday. The helplessness I feel in the face of dad’s condition aggravates me.

Here is an update on dad’s health.

I don’t know where the time has gone since I took dad to the hospital on Wednesday the 17th… two weeks have flown. After a few days in the neuro-intensive care area with constant monitoring and CAT scans and an MRI, they released him to inpatient rehabilitation. There he learned to use a walker, to talk around the gaps in his word-memory, to care for himself… put on his shoes, brush his teeth, and all those little things. Even so, he has a long way to go and he will be discharged from the hospital Thursday. My brother will move him to an assisted living facility in De Forest, a few blocks from the clinic and a few blocks from the church. He is 83 going on 84, and I think this will be a permanent arrangement.

When I see him searching for words and giving up on crossword puzzles and other simple things he used to enjoy, I am saddened. But he is accepting and seems generally happy. We had him out of the hospital this weekend looking at a few assisted living places. He turned thumbs down on two alternatives but was cheered by what he saw at the place he chose to stay. There are few enough people there that none will be strangers. The care is customized to the residents need, so as he improves he’ll have less close supervision on stairs and such and more independence. It’s close enough to the farm that we can make field trips to select furnishings and he can have a hand in closing his old place up.

Dad is a very sociable guy, and his relationships have been active ones such as bowling and golf leagues, card clubs and the like. Those activities will likely be very limited, so this is a new chapter in his life. I’ve been with him a lot, nearly every day, but I’m off to DC tomorrow, returning Saturday, so next time I see him he’ll be in his new digs. Thank you for keeping us in your hearts. These are very difficult days, but we are blessed in many ways, not the least of which is the recoverable nature of dad’s stroke.

Thanks to all who have been supportive during this time. Fondest thanks to her who got me the heck out of town for a few days for a fresh perspective (and from whom I stole the mythic characters, Anger and his three-legged dog Grief).

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