Uselessness

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  • Fighting clinical depression is inevitably a lonely struggle. What could be less conducive to compassion than a disease that make you whine? Laymen and loved ones tell you to get a grip. They make you feel ashamed to be sick. Even if they’re more enlightened about the disease, they can’t help but harbor a secret, naturally human, belief that you are suffering a failure of will rather than biochemistry. Meanwhile, the doctors consider little but the neuro-soup and turn you into a shambling medical experiment, testing pharmaceutical nostrums on you that are as blunt as the mind is subtle, though just as unpredictable. But, for you, life just trudges on. It remains, despite whatever visible signs of well-being – wonderful spouse, great kids, well-located house, etc. – a purgatory of uselessness, barren of joy and meaning. Love, incoming or out-going, becomes something you think, not feel.
    John Perry Barlow

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    One Comment

    1. Posted July 20, 2024 at 10:42 | Permalink

      Frank,

      Did I mention how great your site looks without that header graphic? Well, it most certainly does have a much better look.

      I was think recently about a whole series of blog posts based upon the criteria in the DSM-IV. Depression certainly IS a misunderstood dirorder and JPB nails some of the realities of the problem.

      My biggest problem with reading the DSM IV is the fact that I can see too many of the disorders in my behaviors…

      I’ve been figthing off a serious round of depression for about 60 days and I must admit that the web has been more than helpful in terms of distraction and by offering a place to whine and seek opportunities to force my mind to more fruitful pursuits.

      Doc Serles made a comment on a recent Gillmor gang podcast that almost every Behavior Disorder can be mapped into some varient of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder… Doc was apparently quoting another source. Gambling, alcohol, sex addictions etc are likely what Doc was referring to but depression is a pure system affect of the brain and without much external stimulus-response source… So, the stimulus-response aspect of depression is to mask the internal symptoms. Keep busy… seek activity to trigger the body top release brain chemicals:

      Breath, meditate, self-medicate with caffeine, write and impassioned blog post or comment

      But the best of these seems to be exercise.

      So, what prompted this post? Would you care to be a bit less eliptical?

      Did you see “Just Shelley” today? 118 degrees yesterday and tornado last might. never a dull moment for Shelley.