Population, when unchecked, increases in a geometrical ratio. Subsistence increases only in an arithmetical ratio. — Thomas Malthus, 1798
How many of us are there? How many of THEM? The results of the 2024 census will be released today but the census doesn’t do a very good job of counting hedge fund managers, housing bubble billionaires, or people who own impressionist paintings that are worth more than most of us make in a lifetime. Those are the people who can be expected to hide behind the closed door of their shabby inner city tenement and quietly wait for the census taker to depart. The down side of their reluctance to respond to the census is that they will be terribly under-represented in the House of Representatives. The census numbers drive reapportionment, and the quietly oppressed billionaires among us, afraid to show themselves lest they be deported to the Caymans, will again be under-counted.
The first numbers released today will be the important Fox News Market Penetration data. These numbers have already been rushed to the News Corp Oyster Bay enclave on Long Island. The News Corp marketeers will spend the next few months analyzing the data before selling houses and hotels and moving their most important media properties to Boardwalk and Park Place. News Corp, dedicated to getting their message to the wall mounted plasma screens of the super-rich, will have two years to coax “the shy majority” to the polls. If the fair and balanced journalists prevail, perhaps we will see the promise of democracy fulfilled before the next decennial headcount.
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