Now I was reading the Wikipedia on satire, thinking perhaps I would have to field a few emails regarding my willingness to permit my own blog to be used as a soapbox for some free-speechifier sewing seeds of discontent throughout the entire Goebbelsphere and here’s what it says:

A very common, almost defining feature of satire is a strong vein of irony or sarcasm, but parody, burlesque, exaggeration, juxtaposition, comparison, analogy, and double entendre are all frequently used in satirical speech and writing. The essential point, however, is that “in satire, irony is militant”[2]. This “militant irony” (or sarcasm) often professes to approve the very things the satirist actually wishes to attack.

So I gotta ask you, where is the dooble-whatsis in your post? And what about burlesque? I don’t see no dancing girls.

Just watch it buddy. I banned McD and I could ban you in the blink of a reddened eyeball.

Since she has a college degree in literature she’s figured a way to tie the pram to the handles on the treadmill in an ingenious way that allows her to sit on the couch and watch Oprah with our son Patrick or play WOW. It also gives her time to cook and clean and think up new event planning management techniques. Also, she will be doing any interior decorating if I do decide to get a new office for my new project. She’s amazing at that stuff!

I also unplug the 60 inch when I go to bed when I remember. I check the pressure on the tires of all four of my cars which often makes me late to photowalks with Thoma Hawk. Or like if I have to run out to get a couple lobster sandwiches or a bucket of chicken and some beer when Winer drops by. I’ve ordered some really rockin’ cartoons drawn on business cards from MacLeod that sort of kill two birds with one stone. First, they are very f@&!ing funny and are all about saving energy and they fulfill my need to help the homeless. He’s not doing so well and well, I want to do my part. I tried to get Bono to sign one but he didn’t even know who I am. Like those old people in my neighborhood. I plan on giving one to Tracy Chapman if I see her on one of my neighborhood photowalks or if like Maryam joins a bookclub or coffee klatch with her or something. She rocks!

I’ve replaced all the batteries in *ahem* Maryam’s toys with rechargeable ones which will certainly cut down on our footprints because she forgets and sometimes puts them in the trash compactor. I would tell you what kind of rechargeables I use but they are one of my new sponsors and I will be revealing this information next week. Promise. All I can say is, They Rock!

Speaking of footprints, Maryam read me this the other day and although I sometimes come off as a tough guy, I must admit it brought a tear to my eye and made me really think about a lot of things.

“One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?”

The Lord replied,
“The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints in the sand,
is when I carried you.”

(We actually have a copy of this attached with pineapple and sushi magnets (present from Loic) on our Liebherr SBS-32O Stainless Steel Fridge.)